Tangled

I'm just too messed up
Finding someone to chat on Whatsapp
Faces confuse me - old and new
Want to dissolve like the morning dew

Things that could be said
Remain in my mind
Thoughts escaped somehow
Leaving me behind

Enjoy your coffee and don't be judgmental.

I am having my coffee and was simultaneously reading up on Deepika Padukone. Because I wanted to know about her fitness regime and generally laze away and not read something intellectual for a change.

Ha! The above is wrong on so many levels that I wont get into now.

That got me thinking that we have so many stereotypes around us and we actually cosy upto be judgmental about anything and everything. about them. Lets rant away together and take those big feet out of our mouths now! DO let me know if you agree with it or not and I shall duly note them down .Ha! (again) ;)

1. Reading / watching celebrities is for lazy asses and people who have no aim in life

- so what if we delve into stardom in our own ways ? Its such a sight for sore eyes when I see PeeCee at exotic locations and surfing away in blue waters which probably cannot be photoshopped. Enjoy the view even if you do want to be selective. I mean you are in India. You cannot escape the obvious, that is films and cricket.

2. Anybody other than friends and family are suddenly to be suspected/to be arrogant upon.

- we talk a lot about serendipity and love watching strangers falling in love in movies. Ask yourself, have you ever smiled warmly at a stranger? Ok even if you did, do you ever reply back to their friendly attempt to know more about you even if it is a 20 min bus ride? Then all our sense of adventure fails and we are no different form the forlone plants we see on roadside which everyone sees but no one cares about. we have all become similar faces in the crowd.

3. We say we are in Kalyug. What is the opposite of it?and have you ever lived in that to compare between both?

- We keep saying 'our generation is gone for a toss... We are losers....' How exactly? Some of the best inventions are,were and being done in our times. We have almost everything to call a comfortable life. These couldn't have been achieved without brains right? Yes, if you say we are not happy that is not the entire population but some people only and such evil beings are there in every family,country,group,age and times.

4. Marriage is it. 'She is married ,she is done'

- is marriage the end of a tunnel or a pt in which you fall accidentally? Its neither and inspite of all the Mr.andMrs jokes doing the rounds of Whatsapp and Facebook all people ,both single and otherwise know as a fact that it is just a phase of life. Like getting a pimple and it going,getting the school pass certificate and school ending,every phase in life comes and goes. It brings changes along with it which is natural and also maturity along with it to deal with its own set of issues and topics.
Worse is when we take for granted other relationships just because someone is married. Sometimes its the best friend of the new Mrs. who assumes she will be sidetracked or the sibling of the husband who feels he may have to leave home. You know,when we wish luck for newly weds ,we should probably wish we remain the same around them!
Also its your choice to be married,single,yellow,dirty,pony tailed or whatever.

I know there are many...and while I finish my coffee please do throw some stereotypes here. Remember,this ain't Kalyug and you gotta shed your inhibitions since I ain't a stranger anymore :)

Two and a half mind

How does one respond to gays and gay matters?

At one end is the virtuous me trying to fit in an imaginary social circle where all are cool with this whole gay uprising. In group chats and conversations even my Android phone autocoorects dazed mind to gay. I just nod imaginably to some of my friends  who say people have a right to live as they want. To which my life is always autocorrected. I'm all for that.

So why do I have a dazed mind? Why aren't I so gay about this whole thing...yet?

Somewhere we become old fashioned. We run to the safety of our known behaviour to unknown developments and news. We cannot imagine attending a wedding where there is no gown and pink satin. We have to bitch about the bride's flawless makeup and sly comment on the groom's job. Two men holding hands is viewed as Paes and Stepanek winning the US Open Doubles or the eve teasers in gallis of small towns who ride on a bike and the pillion fellow hugs the rider to show girls in yellow salwar kameez how desirable he can be. Indian culture is that. Even sitting on our commodes we practice pathetic flirting...with the opposite sex. And by the way even girls do that. Otherwise gay is standardly referred to the designers who bring all the latest styles in Fall/Rain/Sunny/Cloudy seasons. Apparently the new stereotype in the market is that these 'kind of people' have better creative aesthetics than anyone else.

Then I have friends who totally support gays. And because I'm always trying to fit in ,whether it is with intellectual friends or in a M size dress, I nod along.

Personally (There goes the disclaimer ) , I believe that each person whether gay,straight,single,religious, puny,street vendor, bungee jumper or Mallika Sherawat have a right to live as they want. As long as :

a) you don't hurt your loved ones' sentiments.
b) you are 100% sure of your decision.
c) you don't have to hide it till you die.

And that's what I really I wanna say. If as a gay you are a better human being than straight people then who am I to judge you?

Go

You . you there.
Do you have a heart?
Can you feel silent tears?
Can you see how it is to be taken for granted?

Can you?

No?

Ok then stop with your false projections of love and concern.

Go throw your mask. Its so plastic that it wont biodegrade in a zillion years.

Living with parents

Conversation between 2 women. One the kind that is very close to hubby and thinks rest of the world is invisible...SatiSavitri . The other lady still getting a grip on the world and generally likes to observe...Binocular.
 Location - wherever there are 2 chairs

SatiSavitri - So how are you enjoying the new married life?

Binocular - Ok. Lots of new people and customs. But easy to get a grip as in-laws are with us. My parents are anyways here too.

SS - What do you do in your free time?

B - At home or friends. Read..and...

SS - Hey where all did you go with your hubby?

B - Still have to get around going out together.

SS - There is a great restaurant which has couple specials most weekends. Let me see which area is it.

B - Well... in that case both parents can come too...It will be..

SS - Are you not tired of living with first your parents and then in-laws now?

B - not really...I mean I was studying in different cities as my parents were in army hospital jobs,so I kinda knew a life with them. I had my freedom so no one messed with anyone.

SS - Eeeek. Im so glad me and him are alone. Phew! House is as we want.

B - such as?

SS - You know...like we have our minibar and loud music playing whenever we want.

B - I have my Ipod.

SS - Hurummpmhh! Have you checked the Sony speakers?

B - You know we have just started our lives,so me and hubby are looking at expenditure one thing at a time.

SS - You gotta enjoy life for a while. Don't tell me you will pop a baby in a year.

B - Ain't they God's gift?

SS - *touches forehead*  Am sure that dialogue came from an aunt or mother in law?

B - All mothers say the same. But its k. I guess parents are all like that.

SS - and thats why we have our minibar

B - Yeah and we have fun evenings! :)

Courtesy - my friend Deepa and her experience.

Another lesson on 'maturity'

So one of my fav actresses died today. RIP Sukumari.
No, this post is not a tribute to her.... just a thought on the reaction usually seen when fans express their sorrow at something happening to their star.
My friend,though,not straightaway,mocked my brief gloom at the news. I did not cry bucketlodas but felt blue nonetheless. I admire her work and really felt Malayalam cinema suffered a loss. Cliche words but thats how I felt.
But why is it so odd that a person far far away from a star is not allowed to genuinely express their feelings. Especially someone who is not in the 'hormonal age' where it is perfectly acceptable to go gaga or cheechee over their fav stars? I mean,people like me,a mom and well in the 20's- what?..I cannot still like Katy Perry and go gaga when Blake Shelton retweets my tweet (not done yet,still hoping)?
 Of all the discrimination a person has to suffer during his lifetime here,one of the most subtle is this : 'Act your age.You are above 25 you can't follow SRK in twitter!'

The coming-of-age Mom

Babies can be inspiring.

We look up to our elders,teachers,quote dot com and neighbourhood chacha for guidance and seldom apply it. Watch babies and relish in the simplicity of what you can learn from them.

Me and hubby,the brand new parents,recently went on a spending spree and first got a JCB to plow a hole a field in our pockets. Which resulted in a lot of toys,branded baby clothes,baby bags and did you know you get a feel-good-factor when your tot pees on branded mat too?

So after we redid our room so that it looked like a mini kindergarten, I made sure my little angel would play with the toys,run around the yellow-red room ,I can continue to facebook and that in his smiles I will get the ROI of whatever we spent. #Materialistic mother

However,after some days when the trailor wore off and I realized I will not make it to the Oscars for Best Mom-for-increasing-sales-of-MadeInChina-Fisher toys, I was mildly confused. The eternal question haunting moms since the stone age- why do they keep crying?

It's like a stone age itself to understand why. Comes not with books on babies or 10-ways-to-be-a-superb mom dot com.

It takes just an empty earring box or the lid of the old oats tin to make them happy. They are not impressed by your branded Fisher toy or the softest of fabric which covers them. It doesn’t matter if you have spend thousands on a cradle for them and what?!.... they are not going to sweet slumber on it. Materialism is far from the simple mind of a baby. Brands,tags,price lists,currencies,packaging and the crap with which our decisions are guided are like a whiff of air for them. Pooof!.... and gone!

All they need is you. Your time and attention. Undivided. So I’m logging off now!

Pic courtesy - www.zazzle.com